When I Fall Read online

  I snort. “Who are you kidding? Luke would stick your ass in jail for a few days and get off on it.”

  A wicked smile spreads across her lips. “The gorgeous bastard would do that, wouldn’t he?”

  I lean my elbows on the counter, digging the tips of my fingers into my temples. It feels like my heart is now lodged in my skull, and with every beat, my head throbs with a pain unlike anything I’ve ever felt. A slow pressure builds behind my eyes, filling my vision with blotches of indiscernible color. If this is what a fucking migraine is like, I’ll start having sympathy for the people who complain about them, because this shit sucks.

  “Reed.”

  “Yeah?”

  She leans down, bringing her face to my level. All trace of Tessa’s typical smart-ass demeanor is gone, replaced with the same look of concern my sister gave me, standing in my kitchen.

  “Don’t,” I warn, because I know what she’s about to say. “I’m not hung up on her. That’s not what this is about.”

  Her eyebrows pinch together in doubt. “Then what is it about? Because right now, I’m two seconds away from offering you the pint of Ben & Jerry’s I have in my freezer.”

  I straighten up, letting my hands fall to the counter. “I don’t know what the hell that means, but I’m not hungry.”

  Tessa lets out an exhaustive sigh, mumbling the word “men” under her breath before taking a sip of her coffee.

  “Look,” I begin, reaching down to pat Max when he nudges against my leg. “I don’t need a walking reminder of the pussy-whipped asshole I used to be nine years ago coming back into my life. The fact that I ever let some chick get to me like that isn’t something I like thinking about, and having Molly in Ruxton is going to make that a problem. Ow! What the fuck, Max?” I push him away, rubbing my hand along the side of my leg that’s just been mauled. “Jesus Christ. You need your nails clipped.”

  “He just got them clipped. That’s why they’re so sharp.” Tessa walks over to the container of dog treats on the counter and pops the lid off. As soon as she does that, Max goes flying at her, leaping off the floor to get to the treat she’s holding in the air.

  “So, you’re telling me that you’re over her.”

  “Yes.”

  “Completely over her.”

  “Yes.”

  “Good. So when you see her, not if, because it’s bound to happen, and she tells you she’s made a huge mistake and wants you to give her another chance, what are you going to say?”

  She drops the treat into Max’s awaiting mouth, brushes her hands off, and recaps the container, pushing it against the backsplash. Max crawls underneath the kitchen table, cracking into his treat, while Tessa holds her hands out, waiting expectantly for my response.

  “Well?”

  I stare at her. “Do you think I’d actually take her back?”

  “I don’t know,” she answers, moving back to stand across from me. Her fingers play with the knot in her T-shirt. “This girl affected you, Reed, and not just in your typical break-up sort of way. You were straight-up devastated after what she did to you.”

  “I was sad,” I correct her.

  “No, you weren’t just sad.” She points a finger at her chest. “I know how it feels to be way past the point of being sad, and that’s exactly what you were. For a long time.” She drops her hand, bringing both of them in front of her to wrap around her coffee mug. “And now look at you. You’re completely different when it comes to women.”

  “Yeah, I am,” I agree, raising my eyebrows. “What’s your point?”

  She narrows her eyes at me across the top of her mug. “My point is that this chick did a number on you, and when someone who affects you like that comes back into your life, old feelings resurface, whether you want them to or not.” She pauses, her eyes losing focus before she says quietly, “Trust me.”

  I pinch my eyes shut with a heavy sigh.

  Old feelings? No, fuck that. If I do run into Molly, I sure as hell won’t be feeling anything toward her besides the ongoing hate I have streaming through me now. That bitch isn’t getting anything else from me, and Tessa is out of her mind if she thinks I’ll be tempted to take her back. I don’t care if Molly’s sorry. Fuck her and her sorry.

  A damp cloth hits me on the side of the face. I reach up, pulling the towel off my head and catching Luke’s guilty smirk.

  “Ass,” I spit, dropping the towel onto the counter in front of me.

  “Dick,” he replies through a laugh. He turns his head. “Babe, where’s my shampoo?”

  Tessa leans her hip against the counter. “Uh . . . oh, it’s in the other bathroom. Max needed a bath yesterday, and he was out of his doggie shampoo.” She smiles behind her mug. “Now he smells all yummy like you.”

  “You used my shampoo on Max?”

  “I didn’t have anything else to use. Mine’s too expensive.”

  Luke pulls her against his chest and kisses the top of her head. She wraps her arms around him, holding her mug behind his back. He nods in my direction. “What’s up with broody over there? Someone piss in his cereal this morning?”

  Tessa looks at me, smiling against him. “Nah, he’s just upset because his ex-girlfriend’s back in town. She’s the skank who made Reed the glorious man-whore we know and love today.”

  Luke looks at me, frowning. “You gotta be able to get pussy to be a man-whore, babe. Reed’s too busy trying to figure out how to suck his own dick.”

  I flip him off, which only stirs his amusement.

  “Hmm, you know,” Tessa says, smiling coyly at me as she peels away from Luke. She drops her gaze to the lowest part of my shirt she can visibly see above the counter, then brings her eyes back up to mine, gleaming with mischief. “Some guys can do that, and they even finish in their own mouths. I’ve seen it online and it’s . . . surprisingly hot.”

  “I’m out.” I push off from my stool, hearing Tessa laugh quietly as I exit the kitchen.

  This conversation just went from pointless to fucking disturbing, and I don’t need to stick around and listen to Luke weigh in with his opinion on Molly moving back to Ruxton. He’ll just give me shit about it.

  Luke Evans likes to act like he isn’t affected by stuff the way normal people are, but that motherfucker would’ve done anything to avoid running into Tessa after their break-up. I’m just not stupid enough to remind him of that.

  He has a gun somewhere in this house. I’d rather not get shot at.

  “UNCLE WEED! WHAT ARWE YOU doing herwe?”

  I look over my shoulder as I grab some tools out of the bed of my truck. Nolan is running down the driveway toward me, carrying a styrofoam airplane over his head. The damn thing is almost as big as he is.

  “What’s up, little man? Where’s your brother?”

  He stops at my side, watching me closely. “He’s with Mommy. He pooped everwywhere.”

  I smile down at him while he catches his breath, clutching the airplane in both hands against his chest. He has to crane his neck to the side to see around it, which he does so he can look up at me.

  “Whoa!” His eyes double in size as I lift a large tool out of the truck. “What is that?”

  I set the machine at my feet before grabbing a few more items out of the bed. “That’s an auger. Looks pretty cool, huh?”

  “It’s all twisty. Like a big corwk scrwew.” His smile spreads, showing the gap in the front of his mouth where a tooth fell out a few weeks ago. Mia told me he was so pumped to get money from the tooth fairy, he’s obsessed with trying to loosen the rest of his teeth now.

  He’s asked me several times to pull a few out.

  He drops his airplane into the dirt and runs his finger along the smooth edge of the bit. “Can I play with dis?”

  “No way, dude. Your mommy would kill me. Do you want to see her chase Uncle Reed around with one of your swords?”

  He nods animatedly. “Oh yeah! She could chop yourw head off! That would be sooooo awesome!”

 
I shake my head through a quiet laugh. “Jeez. What TV shows are you watching where people are getting their heads chopped off? Game of Thrones?”

  He looks down at the dirt. “I wasn’t watching it, Uncle Weed. Daddy was watching it.” Keeping his head down, he looks up at me from under his lashes. “Mommy got weal mad I got outta bed.”

  Oh shit. That show is definitely not for five year olds. I’d ask him what all he saw, but I’m almost afraid to stay on this subject. Mia will freak the fuck out on me if she finds out I’m talking about graphic violence with Nolan, and I’d very much like to keep my balls.

  “Here,” I say, holding out my tool belt to distract him. Nolan lifts his head. “Carry this for me, will ya? I’ll get the big cork screw.”

  Nolan grabs the belt so fast a few of the tools fall to the dirt.

  He’s always this excited with stuff, no matter what he’s doing. I think I could hand him a bucket of rocks and he’d take it with the same enthusiasm that’s lighting up his face right now. He’s such a cool kid. I never thought about having any, but I’d take Nolan. He’s pretty fucking awesome.

  I wait for him to stuff the tools back into the belt and walk behind him as he leads me up the drive.

  Ben walks out the front door with Chase in his arms as Nolan carries the tool belt toward the back of the house.

  “What’s up, man? You getting started today?” Ben asks, looking down at the machine in my hands as I come to a stop in front of him.

  I’m about to answer when Mia walks out the door, her face flushed a bright red and her hair disheveled. She takes a rag and wipes down the front of her neck as she comes up to stand beside Ben.

  She smiles at me, and it’s that genuine, make-any-guy-do-just-about-anything smile I’m used to seeing from her. Mia returned to Ruxton two years ago after moving away nine years before that. I didn’t know her when she lived here before, since I didn’t attend the same Elementary or Middle School as Tessa and her. Back then, Ben and Mia wanted nothing to do with each other. He tormented the hell out of her, and she was his sister’s annoying best friend. But when she came to visit for the summer two years ago, there wasn’t anything that would’ve kept the two of them apart. Not even a bitter past. Ben staked his claim, and everyone got that message, loud and clear. Mia was his. I couldn’t blame the guy for being drawn to her. It is really fucking easy to like Mia. Everybody likes her. She’s the kindest person I know, and she’ll do anything for anybody. Plus, she took on the role of Nolan’s mom after his real one turned out to be a worthless piece of shit. You’d never know that kid wasn’t hers.

  She’s always belonged in Ruxton. She doesn’t just make Ben better. She makes us all better.

  “Why is your face all red?” I ask, studying the red blotches on her skin.

  Mia bunches up the cloth in her hand. “Chase puked on me. Thank God I had my mouth closed.”

  I look from her to Ben, who seems as casual as if this shit happens daily, then I drop my eyes back to her, my face pinched in disgust. “He threw up on your face?” I turn to Chase, who’s hiding his guilt well. “What the hell, dude?”

  “He’s a baby, asshole,” Ben replies, sounding annoyed. “They throw up. It’s not like he was aiming for Mia.”

  “Does he like give you a warning or something?” I ask.

  A valid question on my part. I hold that kid a good bit.

  Ben stares at me for long seconds of silence. “Yeah. He usually tells you what’s about to happen with his extensive vocabulary.”

  Mia laughs quietly, looking at Chase and grabbing his little arm. She forces him to wave at me. “Can you say what’s up to Uncle Reed?”

  Chase chews on his other fist, smiling around it at Mia while I go completely unnoticed.

  Mia looks back at me and studies the machine in my hand with a curious frown. “What is that thing?”

  I motion with my head for them to walk with me around the side of the house. I need to get back there before Nolan hides all my tools in places he can’t remember.

  “It’s gonna help me dig the holes for your deck. I’m at least going to put the posts in today.”

  Mia’s mouth drops open, and she looks up at Ben as she tucks the washcloth into her front jeans pocket. “What deck?”

  Ben smiles at her as we get to the back of the house. “The deck Reed’s building for you, Angel. You keep saying you want one. It looks like he’s starting on it today.”

  “But I thought we were going to wait until we saved up a little more money. I didn’t think we’d get one built this year.”

  “Reed’s only charging us for materials. We have plenty of money.”

  “I don’t know why you two are insisting on giving me anything. You know I don’t feel right about charging you. I can do this for free. It’s not a big deal.” I set the auger down in the grass and scan the backyard for Nolan. He’s up on the wooden landing of the swing set, sending each tool one-by-one down the sliding board and laughing hysterically when they hit the bottom. I take a mental inventory of the tools in that belt to make sure there’s nothing in there that could be dangerous to him.

  “We’re paying you something,” Ben corrects me, gaining my attention.

  We’ve gone over this a dozen times, but I still don’t feel right about it.

  “You’re not doing this shit for free.”

  Mia lifts her hand and rubs it against Chase’s back when he stirs against Ben. “How long do you think it will take?” she asks me.

  I look at the house, squinting as I run through the plans I have in my head. “Depending on the weather, if I can get over here every weekend, I should be able to have it done by the end of the month. You might not have the stairs ready, but you’ll at least be able to use it while I’m finishing up with that.”

  Mia grins so big, I think her face might actually split in half. “Oh my gosh! This is so exciting! We’ll be able to sit out on the deck and eat under the stars.” She links her hands around Ben’s neck, kissing all over the side of his face. “I love you so so soooo much.”

  “You better.” He turns his face and kisses her.

  I choose that moment to look back at Nolan. He’s at the bottom of the slide now, picking up the tools.

  “Hey, little man. You gonna help me or what?”

  His dimpled grin hits me, suddenly fueled to gather the tools faster. I turn back around, regretting it the second I see Ben’s tongue slide into Mia’s mouth.

  “Really?” I ask, and they break apart from each other, panting. Their eyes reach mine, and the blinding lust in both pairs has me thinking of other things that will most likely be happening on this deck once it’s built.

  I look at Chase as he continues to chew on his fist. “You better never puke in your mommy’s mouth. That man holding you spends way too much time in there.”

  I realize how that sounds a second after it comes out.

  Mia cracks up laughing, covering her mouth with her hand as I look to Ben for his reaction.

  My first mistake was painting an image of Mia sucking his dick. My second was thinking Ben would find it funny.

  He doesn’t.

  “I’m going to go ahead and get started.”

  “Yeah, you do that,” Ben replies, shifting Chase to his left arm and wrapping his right around Mia’s shoulders. “I gotta head into work. If Nolan doesn’t listen to you, send him inside.”

  I nod, bending down and picking up the cord on the auger. “Yeah, all right. I’m sure it won’t be a problem though.”

  “I’m taking Chase inside for his nap. Let me know if you need something to drink or anything.” Mia gets Chase from Ben and kisses his cheeks. “Come on, baby. Let’s go lay down,” she says quietly against his skin.

  Nolan scampers up to me, eyes wide and wild with excitement. My tool belt in his hands. “I’m weady, Uncle Weed.”

  I smile down at him.

  I originally didn’t have plans today, but that changed the second Riley stepped into my kitchen. S
taying busy this afternoon will keep my mind off shit I don’t want to think about, and having Nolan around will just make this entertaining. He’s always saying the craziest stuff.

  He slaps the hand I hold out for him with all his strength.

  “Let’s do it.”

  EVEN IF I DIDN’T GO out every Saturday night looking for someone to take home, I would’ve still gone to grab a drink after I finished up for the day at Ben and Mia’s. There’s nothing like a cold beer after a hard day working in the sun, and I plan on tossing back a few before I get to my usual reason for walking into McGill’s Pub.

  The crowd is heavy, which is typical for a Saturday night. All the pool tables are taken, and there’s a line forming to play darts at the other end of the bar. Some girls are line dancing in the middle of the room, all of them wearing short jean skirts and cowboy boots. I give the group of them a smile and they move closer together, swaying their hips a little more now that I’ve noticed. I fucking love that. Any of them will do tonight, and if they don’t want to separate from each other, that’s fine. There’s no crowd limit in my bed.

  Hattie, one of the owners and the sweetest bartender in this town, comes to stand across from me as I grab a stool at the bar.

  She gives me a wink and a smile, her friendly face never giving me anything different. “How are you doing, darlin’?”

  I lean in, playing up my game. “I’ll be great once you leave Danny and run away with me.”

  I’m just messing with her, and Hattie knows it. Even if I didn’t think highly of her husband, I despise cheating, and the people who do it. I don’t care if you are in a shit marriage. Get the fuck out of it before you fuck someone over.

  A laugh falls past her lips. “You want a beer?”

  “Yeah, that sounds good. Whatever’s on tap.”

  She places the glass in front of me and disappears into the back for a moment, reemerging with a plate of food. I take a sip of my beer and watch her walk out from behind the bar and carry the plate over to one of the booths lined along the wall. She sets it down in front of a woman whose back is to me, her dark hair pulled up to reveal the delicate pale skin of her neck. The woman looks up from the tablet she’s holding in front of her, and I catch her profile.